Did you know that in my city, if you have an ounce of raw gold in your hand and try to give it to strangers, that unless you put skill into doing it in certain ways, most people will actually ignore and walk away from you?

It’s kind of a great thing about New York — we’re buzzed with our activity get out of the way it’s bidnith time.

But it’s a fantastic thing about collective value. Now — if you wore a “RED BULL” t-shirt and hat, and had a clip-board, and gave cans of red bull away — I’m pretty sure you’d have an easier time giving that away than an ounce of raw fucking gold.

I don’t know why this hits me so much but it’s one of the best ways I have to communicate a recent point. Trying to convince others to value a thing is a whole different task than actually identifying value in a thing. And here’s another note that takes it really far:

What if that thing is you.

In friendships, work, dating, family, all of it — sometimes you’re dealing with someone who’s sensibility is different than yours — like they’d make the ‘foolish’ decision of leaving gold behind, because they don’t see the same value, or they’re out for something else. You kind of have to get in their way and make them see the same things to align with you. Goes to that skill thing I was talking about above. And I think it’s effortful, and in some cases masks who you are. It’s where the salesman tricks go fuckit.

If I were that above redbull man with a clip board — I’m no longer Eric. You don’t know the stupid things I’m enthusiastic about. My bidnith is literally trying to give you a red bull for some reason….I’m like a female character in a story that fails the Bechdel test. No autonomy. And some people see certain people like that. Fuck ’em 🙂

What happens if you try to give someone gold, and they reject it? If your feelings are hurt, this means that you value the person’s e-valuation over the actual value. That’s weird. If you know what you’re working with: Why do dat?

Everything has value, but gold is just one of those well-conditioned ideas — has high value because we’ve also got a healthy amount of use for it and we can make it useful. The reputation gives it social value. If you can identify and obtain it for a reasonable cost — well, your decision there should be a no brainer.

That logic doesn’t follow the actual value of things out there though…or people.

I find that many groups might not actually value its people well…and making sure that happens is a key management responsibility.

In the past: I’ve enjoyed interacting with people who see things differently in life. I think to a ridiculous point. That skill was kind of a game — Some sim script like “Hey, value? Value! Value! Valueeeeeeee.” Nowadays? I’ve actually had my fill of abusive idiots (alcoholism and/or unhappy wealthy priviledged people or their poorly raised progeny, man — go read the constitution and get out of your own way you fucking goose honk — fuck!)

And compared to the past, nowadays I have so few days where I do nothing, and also so many where I feel like I didn’t get enough done or feel that my activities were pretty silly. I’m able to look back on timelines and I do want this year to be very different than last year. I think it’s time to try more new things, and see if I find other busy bees who are looking for the same gold in life that I am. Without a sell.

Like, I’ll smile because the conversation’s fun, but I’m not taking my shirt off or wearing one I don’t wanna.

If you know you have a thing where it’s value can’t be amplified by sharing, you’ll feel ok when others don’t take it. I’ve started taking this approach to work and relationships, and I love this fun fact: heart rate has been like 5 bpm on average less since. Either I got more fit after a rest day, or I’m on to something.