Welp, let’s tell my last post to suck it because last week I had a 19 hour workday.  There’s something about wrapping up and going “Oh hey, I’m 5 hours away from a 24 hour work day.”

Thank the union and capitalist gods for overtime I guess.


But more importantly, FOOD:


I learned how to deep fry.  Or rather, I explored how to deep fry.   Anyone who can make soup, can deep fry.  The difference is boiling something in lipids vs water.  And I like taking a creative and an experimental approach, for example wings.  Are fried wings really better than baking? (The answer is yes.) But what if you combine the two, and bake and then flash fry wings? Turns out that’s even better than fried, unless you’re eating the chicken as soon as it’s cool enough.   And are hot wings better than bbq? (Answer, only sometimes) How about onion rings? Can you use greek yogurt a batter ingredient? (answer, fuck yeah)  Can you fry any meat? (answer, yes) Is fish, steak, chicken or pork most enchanced by deep frying? (answer, yes)

And to offset all the unhealth of 9 pounds of chicken, 2 lb of steak, cod and flounder, pork chops, battered tofu, and fucking onions, I’ve also been making a bone broth and then pouring that over purple cabbage, garlic, green onions and ginger.

Purple cabbage bleeds.  It bleeds into what young-me decided was the cutest hair color.  You just let it soak, and if you pour the boil over the cabbage into a purple container and glance at it every 30 seconds, the color diffusion is more hypnotic and transformative than any ole lava lamp.  I even put beets on the bottom because beets are healthy and make the gradient even more dramatic.

And then I’ve been craving that cabbage stuff the most.  Don’t know why, but I don’t question something that my gut says is healthy (that’s a pon) so I’ve been making that daily.  Except after last friday, the 19 hour day.

Came home and passed out.

Left this mixture out. Sealed.

Came out the next morning after crashing for 14 hours.

I’m gross and have no problem eating almost any food that’s been out for half a day.  FDA guidelines can kiss my ass, there’re starving wallabies out there so who am I to waste food.

But I grabbed the container and immediately realized something questionable.

Jaidree; omg is that bubbling?

Me: Uh *shakes* yeah


Me: *shakes more, mesmerized by the production of gas bubbles from within a liquid mass* Um


Me: Oh. Yeah seems like it *opens lid* Hey is that sauerkraut?


Me: Hm. *reseals lid and googles how to make sauerkraut*

And yes, it turns out that with the exception of bone broth (which you can also ferment, even though I have no idea why one would) that with the amount of salt in that sucker that yes, I have followed a recipe for sauerkraut.   So obviously, I left that out for days more, and even though you’re supposed to let it sit for weeks I got impatient and ate half yesterday.

It’s amazing to me when feed doesn’t rot, but instead transforms into something else.  And I’m the type of weirdo who loves kraut.  And now I’m the type of weirdo who can say he loves his own kraut.

And that’s how I happily discovered how to kraut.  I can’t imagine how many great food recipes are happy accidents, but this is one for me.





Anyway, I’m still learning a lot from my job.  There is a part of me that feels like I’m settling for mediocrity and giving up on certain dreams, but there’s a bigger part of me that thinks that’s almost entirely and patently false.  I took a bargain by trying to have visions turned into traditionally published novels and part of that was that after a few years of trying hard I can apply myself in an office and try later, and that’s exactly what I’m doing.  I’m certainly proud more than any other feeling about being able to report in to where I do.  I have a great manager, I’m part of a great and talented team, and things like say, social security and JPMC have taught me you can not take either of those things for granted.

SSA taught me that politics can overwhelm a sense of team because to me, there, the club mentality was that ownership is more of a risk than anything.  To me, that was why government agencies don’t have people driven to tackle a backlog as much as get their hours in.  (And if I have to express that that’s my opinion based on my experience, kiss my butt, cause that’s certainly what I experienced, hard.)  JPMC taught me that a team’s manager when they need to feel like the most succesful and most recognized individual that games will be had.  I can elaborate on that but think people should elaborate on that for themselves if needed — because smart people playing games can make others’ heads spin.  That’s obvious.

You know why I think emotional intelligence is such an important factor in a workplace environment?  Why I think it correlates with so many people who are high functioning in professional industries? Because it aligns their output with their motivations in the most adaptive way.  Emotional intelligence is knowing when you are not entitled to simply get what you want, as much as creating a plan to earn something and make that clear to others what you hope to earn and get them on board.  Emotional intelligence lets you know if you have such an impoverished ego that you need to misconstrue others’ intentions.  Emotional intelligence lets you do more than feel threatened by others good work, and want to attack others’ poor work.  Emotional intelligence helps predict appropriateness and (others’) sincerity, and take pleasure in playing as part of a greater whole, let’s you take pride and caution in withdrawing from a questionable one, and real joy out of earned success.

Maybe when AI and robots really make pure skill specialization an even bigger factor in professional industry success, then maybe the merit of pure skill will make someone a cut out for being an industrial top dog, but until then, I do think emotional intelligence is at least as important as IQ and skill in anything involving collaboration.  And obviously, a person can’t pick one of the three.


So with that, I’m going to end this rant with this:

Some amazing skills are learned through taking things slowly and painfully first.  Rhythm management games for example — no one learns to be great at one by jumping in at 600 bpm immediately — they develop a background of built reflexes first.  It says a lot when a person has the patience to make themselves learn, and the drive and ambition to acclimate and build. One reason I love the example of vidya games.

But this is where logical people become interesting.  And this too is my (correct) opinion: there’s a huge difference between a logical conclusion and an opinion.  *cough* Opinionated rationale time:

I think more often than not, logical people had painful childhoods.  Not to say traumatized, poor poor victim childhoods it’s just, kids are pain in the ass, impulsive, wonderful but silly creatures.  Sure some kids have that verve and were gifted with the charisma and impulses that made them appealing then.  I’m thinking, a good portion of those who experienced the immediate benefit of charisma may also carry the logic to retroactively analyze why their impulses kicked butt and keep evolving those —  got to be a great benefit, but that’s not the group I’m focusing on.  I want to focus on the nerds who ultimately prove that nerds rule.

I think coldly logical kids are probably not immediately liked.  Rather than hindsight, the ones that build on caution and foresight might not want to jump in to interact.  People who intuit through logic more probably function like introverts because, holy fuck it’s overwhelming to calculate the array of reactions other people can have to almost anything.  This makes for reserved kids.  And of course a cold, reserved kid is going to become a target for silly dumb kids.

But my point is how often these kids become extraordinarily cool adults.  It’s a trial learning to go from a standard difficulty to an expert one.  But logical kids driven to become experts in their own version of cool? They become extraordinary.  Their reflexes, the way their gut speaks and informs on what they think is cool? Makes them badasses in their 30’s.  And this is why I think nerds rule.  I think reflection is a huge factor in adaption and evolving, and some simply won’t do this as much, or as well.  That’s going to carry a cost.

Basically, folks who are illogical and loud are their own biggest obstacle. Sometimes folks with this combination might be fun, sure, and I’m sure like anyone they’re capable of demonstrating great virtues, but they’ll have a hard time feeling like a validated, excellent person.  So if I had to choose groups to bank on for some reason, I think logical kids who have experienced challenging childhoods can grow into some of the most outstanding adults.


Now it’s time for a loud opinion: Cool nerds can make the best leaders.


Yesterday was a 16.75 hour workday.

I didn’t believe the math until I did it 6 times while calculating my timesheet.

And I honestly don’t mind.

Doctors still have it harder!


I don’t know why some people like to talk about pain.

I really don’t.

If you’ve found a chance to talk about pain that your listener didn’t realize was an opportunity to talk about pain at all, ask yourself: why are you really talking to this listener.

Also, if you’ve had the chance to learn how to spell “lose” and “loose” and haven’t yet gotten the reigns on that, you suck.

These two thoughts are attached because the above types of people will randomly bring up tragic looses.


Lessons Learned: Decade Review

Time is super finite, and going faster and faster, but no one can prove it.

A key trait among toxic people is they think they’re the only one’s allowed to be angry and expect everyone to validate their narrative.

Try, if you don’t succeed, try again.  If you still don’t succeed, get good.  If you don’t get good, do something else – it’s just life man, it’s not that serious.

There are songs from your childhood that will follow you to the end of your days, and it’s damn fine to occasionally remind yourself of their magic.

Not everyone ages at the same rate.

There is no shame in trying something new, and there’s tons of glory in doing it well.

Education allows for greater recreation.

Readership ain’t what it used to be, and that correlates with so much more.

Technology is way, way more than it used to be.

If you want to work out, focus on busting your ass.  Focusing on work out toys is a recipe for excuses and disappointment.

Cheaters are automatic losers.

A succinct email is more powerful than a thorough one.  Less is more.

If you don’t question, you’re a fool.

If you don’t ask when you should have, you’re an idiot.

If you just doubt, you’re a drag.

Great people tend to find gooder relationships.

If you have money, invest it in something.

Seriously, you’re fucking doofyface if you’re just sitting on any amount of money.

A good boss and a good team is many times more valuable than the paycheck offered.

You can kill yourself over not being perfectly happy but there’s still massive peace to be found in recognizing the reliability of being perfectly content.

It’s easy to identify a person who has a certain sense of magic.  It’s easier to underestimate their worth.   It’s medium-easy to be an arrogant prick who asserts a person’s undervalued worth, but still pretty easy.

“I don’t know” is only an ignorant statement when it’s lazy.

If someone can provide something that is high quality, cheap, and fast, they’re an undervalued intern.

Every action has a reaction, so someone probably dislikes you.

Social currency is a thing.

Please and thank you are important words. Even when they’re not sincere.

Some people just get a wide berth. That’s human chemistry.

If you can’t nicely tell someone to fuck off, don’t say anything at all.

Few things in life have a higher return than good nutrition.

Dependency means turning an asset into a liability.

VR isn’t exactly here, but the tech getting there is pretty solid.

If going out with someone doesn’t lead to a better night than staying at home with a tunafish sandwich, wtf are you doing.

AYCE > The Tunafish Sandwich Standard.   So go outside.

Things that are stimulating get less stimulating when a person gets really good at them, unless there is actual competition.

Never, ever, ever, not calculate the cost of doing nothing.



Almost exactly 4 years ago I ran the marathon.


Before I did, my old man told me he didn’t think I’d finish it

Instead of going “Hey, so what do you think is the point in saying that?”
I told him “…I hope you remember saying that because I’m going to prove otherwise.”


As I ran it, part of the route ran a literal half-block from where he still lived, and I remember thinking “Of course he’s not there”
Why would he want to just stand there? He’s probably pretending he has important things to do.
I kept running. That’s what you do.


Afterwards, he called me and told me that he and some friends were looking at pictures on facebook (which really means he and his girlfriend saw a post I was tagged in) and said that “they” said that it didn’t look like I ran it very fast.”
I told my sister that that was his response, and she told me that she specifically told him not to say that….

All he had to do was one less of those things, and I wouldn’t be questioning why it gets me miffed that he’s such an apparent jackass.  I want to enjoy watching the marathon today, but instead I’m experiencing this side of me that wants to give parenting tips that should just be so obvious.  Which is dumb.

This is oody-poody, and I’ll get to get past it. That’s what you do.


Blowing Smoke

I just wonder how come vaping is coming under fire, but cigs are ok.

Like, I do think vaping is dumb

but that’s mostly because I don’t like it.  Hell, I think mushrooms are dumb. I think people who eat them look like they’re doing something unenjoyable and make fun of them for it (at my own expense – correct opinions sometimes do that) but, that doesn’t mean vapes should be outlawed.

But birth control pills? “That’s ok.”  Hell, what about birth control injections? “Let’s give it a shot!”
Cell phones? “Totally convenient let’s do it.”
Alcohol? Totes cool. “My dad had a drink in college so fuck you you can pry my poison from my cold dead fingers.”
All of these things carry inherent risks, and there’re many more examples.



The above leads me to think that if a company is supposed to be successful, and it’s product carries social/health risks, that it’s supposed to employ lobbyists to avoid an existential crisis.  That’s the only logic-flow I can weave between vapes, and every other product that may carry inherent health risks about things we don’t know (OR, even do know about.)


And again, this is a personal note: seriously, I lost a friend to vaping.

He sucked on a vape and became a hipster and therefore turned into a piece of shit.

But this is America, and we all have the right to become a piece of shit as long as we can afford it and are technically only physically hurting ourselves.

And I don’t know why that’s so hard for others to grasp.